KOTCT
Castle Courtyard => Liar's Bench aka... Pickle Barrel => Topic started by: Templar on July 05, 2013, 05:09:45 AM
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JEFF FOXWORTHY MADE A BUNDLE WITH HIS "YOU MIGHT BE A RED NECK IF..."AND I LOOKED UP SOME ABOUT MICHIGAN---I DON'T THINK ANY OF THESE ARE FROM HIS COLLECTION---HOPE IT GIVES YOU A SMILE:
YOU MIGHT BE A MICHIGANDER IF....
1...SNOW TIRES COME STANDARD ON ALL YOUR CARS.
2...YOUR DEFINITION OF A SMALL TOWN IS ONE THAT HAS NO LAKE
3...YOU HAVE EVER GOTTEN FROSTBITE AND SUNBURN IN THE SAQME WEEK
4...OCTOPUS AND HOCKEY GO TOGETHER LIKE HOT DOGS AND BASEBALL
5....YOU HAVE AS MANY CANADIAN COINS IN YOUR POCKET AS YOU DO AMERICAN ONES
6...YOU DRIVE 70 MPH ON THE HIGHWAY AND PASS ON THE RIGHT
7...YOU OWN ONLY THREE SPICES--SALT--PEPPER--AND KETCHUP
8...YOU DESIGN YOUR HOLLOWEEN COSTUMES TO FIT OVER A SNOWSUIT
9...YOU HAVE 10 DIFFERENT RECIPES FOR VENISON
10..YOU HAVE TAKEN YOUR KIDS TRICK-OR-TREATING IN A BLIZZARD
11..YOU THINK SEXY LINGERIE IS TUBE SOCKS AND A FLANNEL NIGHTIE WITH ONLY 8 BOTTONS
12..YOU OWE MORE ON YOUR SNOW BLOWER THAN YOUR CAR
13..YOU FIND -20F A LITTLE CHILLY
14..YOUR LOCAL DAIRY QUEEN CLOSES FROM SEPTEMBER TO MAY
15.YOU HAVE WORN SHORTS AND A COAT AT THE SAME TIME
16..IF YOU WERE UNAWARE THAT THERE WAS A DRINKING AGE
17.YOUR 4TH OF JULY WAS MOVED INDOORS BECAUSE OF FROST
18..YOU KNOW SEVERAL PEOPLE WHO HAVE HIT A DEER MORE THAN ONCE
19..YOU SWITCH FROM "A.C." TO "HEAT" IN THE SAME DAY
20..YOU GO TO A FISH FRY EVERY FRIDAY............................................
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;D ;D ;D
It's Goode that you can laugh at yourself.
I see no problem with passing on the right. ;D
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I consider myself an expert driver. My #1 hobby is driving and I drive only about 25,000 miles a year (40,000 km/yr). (#2-Goose & Duck hunting, #3 coins) I drag race at any stoplight with anyone who wants to drag with me. In the last 3 yrs I'm 32-1 (wins / losses. Loss was when I mis-shifted from 2nd to 5th instead of 3rd. In my xx yrs of driving, I consider these are the top 3 laws to follow when driving.
#1 KEEP TO THE RIGHT EXCEPT WHEN PASSING !!!!!!!
#2 Use your accelerator instead of your brakes.
#3 Use your MIRRORS.
I check my mirror/mirrors approximately every 6 to 8 seconds to see what is going on.
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I think you need to check your rear mirrors, in case the Cops are behind you. LOL.
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Goose probably has only mirror because he left the other one on a sing post while passing on the right. ;D ;D
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3. 9. 15. 16. 18. 19. and 20 all could be said about Missourians as well. ;D
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The so called "Expert Driver" tried to drive through a county reconstruction road last night after a 2-1/2" (6cm) rain. Oh well, what's $91 among friends for a towing company. I have a 4WD and a 6 speed stick tranny......didn't help. I'll forward a pic to Steve and maybe he can post it. I don't know how to post on this site.
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Here it is...
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Well, at least now you know 2 things. :) How much a tow cost, and just how much mud is too much mud. :o 8) ;D
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IN NOVEMBER WHEN IT IS DEER SEASON IN MICHIGAN WE HAVE ABOUT 500,000 DRIVERS ON THE ROAD AT ONCE AND YOU WILL FIND THAT THE SURVIVAL SPEED IS 85MPH+ IN THE RIGHT LANE----THE LEFT LANE IS WHERE THE COPS PATROL AND IF EVERYONE IS MOVING IN A STRAAIGHT LINE THE COPS JUST MOVE ALONG--BUT LET ONE HUNTER DECIDE THE SPEED IS TOO SLOW AND MOVES INTO THE LEFT TO PASS THATS THE ONE THE COPS NAIL--SO THE BEST THING IS STAY IN THE PACK OR THE LIONS WILL PICK YOU OFF...................